Many years ago an organisation called Women in Transition helped women restore their lives after abuse, divorce or other trauma. I don’t even know if they exist anymore but they did a powerful service for less fortunate people.
When I entitled this blog Woman in Transition, I was writing about me! Fortunately I have no need for the original women in transition but my experiences over the past fifty years – at least – have caused me to reinvent myself multiple times and guess what – I am at it again!!! It never ends, I am pleased to report but at times it can be terrifying. Women especially have to understand that a lot of people in their lives, just don’t see it that way. Oftentimes I was told when I started this personal growth and spiritual change that ‘they liked me much better before this rubbish started’. Now I am at the stage in my life when my grandchildren just grin and say ‘that’s Nana, that’s how she is’.
In the not too distant past, my son Colin, his wife Sheryl and two daughters, Morgan and Zoie were shopping in Target (Tarjay as it is known). It just so happened that when they checked out the cashier also worked at my bank. When he presented his credit card she asked in delight ‘Oh, are you Dr. Kaye’s son?’ Colin thought for a moment and then asked “Why? What has she done now?” I take great pride in that – keep ‘em guessing keeps it green!
However, being in transition is not always that simple. My journey has taken me from probably being the worse (or best depending on who was in my life) codependent on the planet. Every word ever written in Codependent books is all about me! I recognize every aspect, obvious and subtle. That’s why I am a women’s advocate today. It’s what I know best. No training necessary.
It is all about self worth, confidence and disregarding most of what is taught about how the female of the species is supposed to be. NOT ANY MORE!!! Not in my perception of life. I have been given many wonderful gifts one of which is that I will listen to people whose opinions really matter to me and not be defensive. Years ago, another gift. A very wise woman told me……….remember Yvonne, your children are watching you. What incredible depth. From that moment I changed my attitude to life which included altering my marital state. It doesn’t have to be that extreme but if it is, it is. I released my children from ‘this is the way you have to be’ to ‘you are miracles – follow your bliss’.
My entire journey is currently being written in a book. To this point, nobody wants to publish it because it is an autobiography and I am not newsworthy. No scandal – just overcoming huge challenges and living after survival. I will keep writing as it is very interesting in how much I remember. My phrase has been for years – if I had a memory I’d be dangerous but it is really astonishing how one thought enacts another.
The current transition is taking its toll. I know enough about the metaphysical world to know that if I don’t listen, things are going to be taken away from me until I do. For years I have said to myself and others – no more individual counseling. Bread and butter thought otherwise. I didn’t want to travel as much to teach and lecture – so the well dried up completely! My situation is rather like a rich person losing their wealth – it is much easier to go from poor to rich, than rich to poor even though it has its complications. Likewise, having been very well known nationally, due to personal issues, I decided to stay local. VERY FEW PEOPLE KNOW ME!!! It is a struggle with all the resentments one holds for those one has accommodated in the past, not being available now. What a load of rubbish. Growing has taught me that I am responsible. I am working with remarkable women of Personal Touch Concierge Service, LLC, and Yours, Mine and Hours to get me through this – I JUST DON’T DO WHAT THEY WANT ME TO DO. So I learned yet another lesson – the old excuses just don’t work! The computer is presenting a huge challenge to me – I WILL WIN!!!
So I am on this rather nerve wracking but exciting journey of meeting myself again. Stay tuned – it might be a rough ride at times, but what’s life without a roller coaster!!!! It’s too big for one blog but you can hear some of it at lectures I am presenting at two locations. Children and Youth, Suite 200, Swamp Road, Doylestown Pa at 5.30. September 24th or Shanahan Hall, Livengrin Foundation, 4833 Hulmeville Road, Bensalem Pa, registration at 7.p.m. October lst.
Hope to see you there.
